Archive for Solopreneurs


Why is my income not growing?

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That reason is NOT what you think–it’s not “the economy” or your level of education. The real reason why money is the way it is in your life is your money blueprint. Your money blueprint is made up of the automatic or conditioned responses that come up when you are thinking about money, or dealing with it. It also includes thoughts, beliefs and emotions around money, wealth, success, self-worth and receiving good things.

Most of this programming is fear based and negative. It comes from our primary drive to survive, to stay alive. This programming keeps us focused on avoiding danger. It doesn’t support us in many of the skills we need to build a business or grow our money, because it stops us from taking any risks AND often leads to money avoidance—not looking at anything that could be scary or unfamiliar, including looking honestly at our finances. The fear programming can also create a stress response-and we go into fight, flight or freeze when anything seems to go wrong.

The solution is to bring the programming into awareness—shining the light on it. Then we clear these old limiting programs and create new programming that makes you feel powerful and helps you stay in positive action. Sounds good right? How do we get started?

1. Shine a light into the subconscious—your critical first step. As a Tapping into Wealth coach I have some very specific processes for doing this. Working on your own, start by looking at your money situation. Look at your income—write it down on a piece of paper. Is it enough? If not..

What beliefs or emotions would lead to this kind of financial situation?
Example: You have a really great business idea, but you keep attracting business partners or employees who don’t help, or who drain you. Some possible beliefs could be “I can’t trust anyone” or “I have to do it all myself” or “I am not supported”

2. This can be tricky to find since it’s buried in the subconscious. That’s where a coach really comes in handy!

3. If your pattern is one step forward and two steps back, or it feels like there is an invisible limit on your success and income, look for inner conflicts that need to be eliminated.

Sometimes our desires conflict with our subconscious, survival programming. Say you set a goal to double your income, but your subconscious belief is “If I make that much money my family or friends will have a problem. They’ll be jealous, threatened, critical, or want my money”. When you have a conflict like this, guess who wins? Your subconscious fears will, almost always.

However you do it, it’s critical to shine the light, and replace the old subconscious programming that created your current finances. Otherwise it’ll be really really hard to change your money situation, since it’s the subconscious that is running the show.

Please continue to read this ongoing blog series to learn more and start changing your money blueprint. The next post focuses on the first layer of the money blueprint—the verbal programming you received around money, wealth and success. Have fun exploring your blueprint!

Make sure to join me for Tapped into Wealth Tuesdays. (Next one is July 28 and then we resume on 8/11).
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Perfection’s Hidden Cost

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Hidden Costs of Perfectionism

What happens when you are trying to get things perfect? What happens when you put off an important decision because you need to be sure it’s the right one?

I’ve been blogging about the Hidden Gifts of perfectionism and today I want to talk about the hidden costs. This “hidden” but truly expensive problem bugs me so much (and has haunted me personally) which is why I’m offering the 30 Days to Retrain Your Brain for Success challenge, which begins on Thursday the 16th.

There are both time and dollar costs, besides the unnecessary stress of extra work, trying to attain perfection or get it “just right”. You also undermine your own self-confidence because you are focused on what needs improvement, NOT on what’s already good, so you are in fault-finding mode. You don’t get to feel good about what you’re doing.

Endless tweaking or second guessing yourself can easily turn into procrastination. You can measure the cost of procrastination not only in terms of time but also money. When you keep rewriting or redesigning your program, or holding off on a key decision trying to “get it right”–these are all a way of saying “WAIT” to the Universe.

Guess what else “waits” on you? Your income! These patterns seriously slow down your incoming cash flow.

The truth is that “perfect” is an unattainable goal. You can perfect things and tweak them indefinitely. You can stay in indecision or procrastinate on hitting the send button, for a long time, weeks, months, even years. The cost is your time, but also lost income and growth opportunities.

The solution is simple and I call it a no-brainer (pun intended)–the Retrain Your Brain for Success 30 Day Challenge.

Join me on Thursday 7/16 AT 7:30 pm Eastern. We’ll be creating a new empowering set of habits called Motivation by Celebration…with support from me and an amazing group of like minded people. Registration information below.

Not quite sure? Test-drive the program with this EFT Meridian tapping session for Releasing Perfectionism. I give instructions so you can tap along with me! Listen here:

Ready to Retrain? Let’s get it started in here!

Give your Inner Critic a summer vacation and give yourself the gift of happy productivity! Total value is $450 and at $97 it truly is a no-brainer. \.

Sign up for Success Retraining below:

Ellen Anne Shapiro

Now I’ve got your attention!

Being kissed could definitely provide some motivation, but what I’m talking about here is the acronym KISS. You know it, right? It’s Keep It Simple Sweetheart.

Apply this to your business and your life, to anything you want to be successful in. The brain functions best when given small manageable tasks, or achievable goals. Assigning yourself  a 7 day to-do list, or big projects that are NOT chunked down into bite sizes, the brain gets overwhelmed and may go into overload
and shut down. You may start to feel anxious, overwhelmed or even want to avoid your work because it the brain says “It’s too much! I can’t do this.”

Turn that around and give yourself simpler, achievable goals, breaking larger tasks or projects into pieces. So you create daily, even hourly “wins” for yourself–completions all along the way.  


So, KISS your overwhelm goodbye and retrain yourself to get a lot more done: join us for the next Retrain Your Brain 30 day Challenge that starts July 16th.

“Turn Your To-Do! List into a Ta-Da! List”
(Ta-Da! Is like the magician pulling the rabbit out of the hat!) .
See You On The Other Side

We’ve just explored in part 1 of the Hidden Gifts of Perfection, how to sift out what is good from your perfectionism—the drive for excellence—from the unwanted self-punishing aspects.  Let’s look now at a different aspect of the perfectionist vow.

When you look back at some achievement from the past,  do you say, “Yes, it went well, but truthfully, I could have done better.”  It’s true that there is always room for improvement—and  we can always strive to do better.    It’s also true that if our standard is perfection—that’s like a moving target.  How will we know if it’s perfect?

Since we are striving for an unattainable goal, we will always feel like “I’m not good enough.  I don’t deserve success—yet.”   It sounds like yet another aspect of how perfectionism can keep you running in place and getting nowhere.   When you see someone who is constantly busy, working hard yet  not making progress or getting the rewards, he or she is probably running a vow of perfectionism.

The perfectionism can also be a “front” for the fear of failure.  If you secretly fear that you aren’t good enough then you won’t risk putting your energy behind your offers, your marketing, etc.   Someone may even look capable and confident from the outside but because of their hidden fear of exposure, they don’t go all out, or they don’t try for the bigger clients and recognition.

This is closely related to a recognized syndrome called the Impostor Syndrome in psychology—where successful accomplished professionals and  experts, such as doctors and attorneys,  have been shown to have a huge fear of being revealed as not knowing their stuff, or inadequate in a major way.

What  are the gifts here?  Once we shine a light on the perfectionism, and all the ways that this lifelong vow has led us to be excellent, we can actually acknowledge how skilled and excellent we are, right now!  We acknowledge that there will always be room for improvement,  yet we can feel good enough right now, and deserving.   Once we see that we are giving our energy to an unattainable goal, we can adjust our standards so that we can strive to be  both “Awesome and human too” instead of perfect.

If this speaks to you, I’ve got some specific processes from Tapping into Wealth that  can help with this. Clearing this vow can make a HUGE difference in your success.  Come experience a private session (contact me for a Clarity Strategy Action session) or join us for the next Retrain Your Brain 30 day Challenge.

We set ourselves free, finally, when we realize that there is no one out there who can give us that ultimate stamp of approval.  (This almost always comes from having critical and hard to please parents…who, if still alive,  will not likely give us approval even now—and if they did, it still wouldn’t resolve the child part of us that feels  “I’ll never be good enough” ) Now, as adults, we can see that this is not going to happen.  In fact, craving the approval of others, or needing praise and recognition, can keep you running on a different kind of hamster wheel.

This is not to overlook our very natural and human desire to be recognized, to be noticed and appreciated. Social psychology has shown that appreciation and gratitude is the best path to strong relationships, both at work and in the rest of life.

But what happens when you’re in your own business-where there are so many tasks to be done in a day, and where most of those tasks are invisible to others?  Waiting for others to notice and approve is going to be a long wait!

Because you really are good enough.  You deserve reward and recognition, right now—even if you still want to improve.  You ARE awesome..just the way you are!

Since you are human, and all us humans do  need that approval, how about practicing the very habit we cultivate in the 30 Day Retrain Your Brain Challenge? The habit of celebrating and acknowledging yourself.   Go ahead, do it now.  And notice how it feels to do this.  Does it feels awkward or unnatural, hard to do or to remember to do, is it unfamiliar or uncomfortable?  Now that you see how important this is to staying motivated and happy, and allowing yourself to really go for it–if you’d like to get better at this, join us for the next Retrain Your Brain 30 day Challenge that starts July 16th.

And learn to finally give yourself that stamp of approval!

“Turn Your To-Do! List into a Ta-Da! List”
(Ta-Da! Is like the magician pulling the rabbit out of the hat!) .
See You On The Other Side

Hidden Gifts of Perfectionism Part 1

Perfectionism gets a bad rap these days. Let’s take a closer look and discover what is good about it—that’s the part we want to keep even as we let go of painful, self-limiting perfectionism that gets in our way.

Keeping in mind that people do what works for them. Your friend’s perfectionism is working for them emotionally, even though it might look self-destructive to you. It’s not necessarily logical, but Inside your friend’s brain, it makes sense.

That’s true for perfectionism too.

The first hidden gift is that perfectionism comes from a desire for excellence. Striving to be perfect, or to perfect yourself, can motivate you to put in more effort, to continue to improve your skills or performance.

If you have these kinds of standards, you may identify as a perfectionist, but think to yourself “This makes sense for me to keep these high standards and strive for perfection. This works for me because it makes me study, work, or practice harder” This is so strong we can even call it a vow of perfection. Why would you want to give that up?

Striving for excellence, continuing to develop your skills and talents, is wonderful. Don’t give that up! Our world would be so much poorer without excellent teachers, musicians, athletes, business people, writers, scientists.

The problem is when the vow is absolute and rigid–t’s either excellence or total failure. What happens when we make mistakes, or injure ourselves, or something out of our control stops us? What if we fall short of our high standard? We can be absolutely ruthless with ourselves, and refuse to forgive. We can hold these seeming failures against ourselves for years and years. Ironically that can keep you locked into the failure since you are focusing on avoiding it. Pass-fail is a very tough way to grade yourself.

Edison took 1000 tries to come up with a light bulb that worked and could be produced commercially. What if he judged himself as a failure and gave up after a few tries?

I invite you to try something new. Could you forgive yourself , and learn from your imperfections and so-called failures. If you have a financial or business failure, a disappointment or betrayal, that you just can’t get over, that you suspect might be stopping you, I’ve got some specific processes from Tapping into Wealth to free you to try again—and succeed. And love yourself regardless of the outcome.

Come experience a private session or join us for the next Retrain Your Brain 30 day Challenge.

So keep the gift of excellence going and feeling lighter…

“Turn Your To-Do! List into a Ta-Da! List”
(Ta-Da! Is like the magician pulling the rabbit out of the hat!) .
See You On The Other Side!



90 Days To Get More Done And Have More Fun!
Success In Business

Why Does Work Have to Be So Hard? Part 2

In part 1 of this series we looked at why these beliefs seem to be absolutely true and real, beliefs like: You have to work hard to get ahead, Life is a struggle and It don’t come easy. The struggle and hard work programming run deep and they’ve been part of our culture for hundreds, maybe thousands of years. These beliefs are hard to even see as a program because in some ways they motivate us to work harder and thus feel better or more virtuous about ourselves at least short term.

These beliefs can keep us stuck in a slave mentality even when we are working for ourselves. They keep us unhappy and overworking, or running on the hamster wheel, trying to prove to someone that we are good and worthwhile because we work so hard. Long term we pay a huge price in our health and relationships by overworking and not giving ourselves nurturing and time off. It can also fuel our Inner Critic and Inner Slavedriver.

Why are these beliefs so pervasive, even when we can see that not everyone’s lives are equally difficult? We can see that some people manifest more easily than others. Why cling to a belief we KNOW isn’t true? Why cling to the need for struggle?

There are a number of reasons for this. Still, one major reason for this has been proved over and over by brain science is that our subconscious programming directs our behavior to a shockingly large degree. Research shows now that as much as 98% percent of our behavior is driven by our subconscious programming. Like a computer program, these beliefs, habits of thinking and feeling, run in our nervous system, on auto-pilot. That means that willpower or conscious choice contributes only 2% to your results. The subconscious mind is the key to making lasting change.

Until recently, only hypnosis offered a way to do that. In the last 20 years, there’s been an explosion of new tools and techniques and new understanding of the brain. I specialize in several of these new methods, including Resonance Repatterning and EFT–and this is what you can experience working privately with me, or through my group programs.

We’ll be clearing these struggle programs in the upcoming 30 Days to Retrain Your Brain Challenge. Then we’ll go even deeper in the 90 Days to Get More Done and have more Fun program. Your work life, your level of peace, satisfaction AND productivity, even your self-confidence will never be the same.

Tired of working so hard, for not such great results? Tired of your Inner Critic and Inner Slavedriver running the show? Would it be okay if life (and work) got easier?

Join me for the 30 Day Challenge and 90 Days to Get More Done and Have More Fun group programs, or private coaching packages and programs. Not sure what you need? Sign up for your 1 hour custom, complimentary Clarity Strategy Action session and gain crystal clarity on where you want to be and the next steps for getting you there.

Keep the gift of excellence going and feeling lighter…

“Turn Your To-Do! List into a Ta-Da! List”
(Ta-Da! Is like the magician pulling the rabbit out of the hat!) .
See You On The Other Side!

Categories : Solopreneurs
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90 Days To Get More Done And Have More Fun!
Success In Business

Why does work have to be so hard? What if it really doesn’t? What if YOU are making it a lot harder than it needs to be?

You have to work hard for everything. It don’t come easy. Life is a struggle. No pain, no gain. Money doesn’t grow on trees! Bet you heard at least one of these growing up!

Reality check: are these beliefs an absolute truth? Do they apply across the board to every person on the planet, equally? The answer is obvious. Clearly, some people manifest things a lot more easily than others, and others struggle much more. Who would you like to be?

We are living with the imprints of the past and recreating struggle and hard work, and haven’t caught up to our new reality. The world we live in now offers ways that our ancestors could not dream of to make money, to be successful on our own terms, work in our pajamas, wake up to income from online sales in our bank account. Much more is possible now than simply wasn’t before.

Hold on before you go down a rabbit hole of magical thinking. I’m NOT saying that no work is required, that all you have to do is make a vision board and ask the Law of Attraction to bring you everything you want without lifting a finger. Vision boards and using the LOA are good they just need to put to work by taking action in the world. The bottom line is that success in business comes from creating value for people That doesn’t happen simply by wishing and imagining. It requires action.

Does it have to be so hard, and so effortful? I say NO! While your success will require work, risk and challenge, it can be an exhilarating adventure and a joyful challenge, rather than hard, heavy, exhausting and overwhelming. What makes the difference? Clear planning, strategic leveraged action AND the right subconscious blueprint.

Take a minute to ask yourself right now, Is there anywhere in my work or business that I am creating unnecessary struggle or more work for myself? Watch your language for a day – what phrases do you use? Do you say words like It’s hard, People are difficult, or repeat other struggle beliefs? Try to observe yourself, without judging. Being curious, being compassionate with yourself and becoming aware WITHOUT beating yourself up is the first step to changing a behavior.

This might be a good moment to grab yourself an Easy button at Staples. One of my favorite self-awareness tool!

Here are the questions I ask my clients and you can ask yourself right now: What’s the payoff to this struggle? Do I get to feel better, stronger, more powerful, more virtuous by holding onto doing things the hard way, and working hard? Do I get to feel closer and more a part of my family by holding on to this (A loyalty vow). Am I willing to let go of struggle and the belief that it’s hard, that I have to work hard for everything I achieve?

Could there be an easier way, and could I open to that possibility? The answer lies in changing your programmed beliefs or subconscious mind which is what ALL my work is about. Read more about this in my next article. You don’t have to wait for that, though, go ahead and check out my upcoming 30 Day Retrain Your Brain Challenge. That’s where we’ll clear these old struggle programs and develop new neural pathways to make life easier, to be more in the flow with your work, and to be kinder to yourself while also staying productive.

90 Days To Get More Done And Have More Fun Presents
30 Day Retrain Your Brain Challenge

Come join us for this habit changing, life changing challenge
30 Day Retrain Your Brain Challenge.
Join other like minded people below by entering your name and email address.
We’re going to have a blast!

While you are here…

Keep the gift of excellence going and feeling lighter…

“Turn Your To-Do! List into a Ta-Da! List”
(Ta-Da! Is like the magician pulling the rabbit out of the hat!) .
See You On The Other Side!

Categories : Solopreneurs
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What’s the secret recipe? It can be found in a magical success zone, called your x-spot. You know, X marks the spot! If you’re wondering what on earth the x-spot is, it’s a term from positive psychology.

Finding your X-spot can keep you motivated and help you reach goals faster, and according to Shawn Achor, happiness researcher, this is a success accelerant. It’s been proven that we actually get a burst of energy when we are near the end of a project, to finish it. This is only true though when we can see that we are close to the finish line.

This is a well-known phenomenon in marathon races….the runners speed up when they reach that point where they can see the finish line. Wouldn’t you think they’d be more tired at the end of such a long race?

Logically yes, but when they are in the x-spot they get a rush of adrenaline to get the goal accomplished. It’ s about perception—seeing that we are almost there, and realizing it is not only possible but almost surely going to happen.

Instead of focusing on how close they are to a goal, and getting in the x-spot, we do the opposite! We tend to focus on how much more work there is to do, or how much further we have to go–making the goal appear more distant. This is how we lose out on the benefit of the x-spot, and actually slow ourselves down and demoralize ourselves.

How can we use this principle to our advantage?

We need to retrain our brain to make goals seem closer. The easiest way to do that is to chunk down their task into smaller pieces. It’ s so practical–it makes your project less overwhelming and more manageable, and easier to fit into your schedule. It also creates regular opportunities to reach the x-spot, for each of the smaller goals, and so you get a boost of energy from feeling you are getting somewhere and making progress towards completion.

Like any habit, this retraining needs to be practiced regularly over time to make lasting change. Habit change is hard on your own and easier with support, which is why I offer 21 day group challenges like Motivation by Celebration: Retrain your Brain for more motivation and productivity.

Come join me at the x-spot café? (We’ll order decaf, since we surely won’t need caffeine with all of our X-spot adrenaline coursing through our bodies!)

When you work for yourself, there is always so much pressure to be productive, to turn your minutes and hours into dollars and results.    In each moment, there are choices to be made about what to do, what to focus on.   It’s easy to get in a downward spiral with continually doubting and questioning yourself and your choices, or driving yourself to work harder, to override your natural rhythms.

Have you noticed that sometimes your best ideas come when you are in the shower, walking the dog, talking to a client, NOT when you are sitting and staring at a screen or a blank notepad. Movement actually makes the brain work better, and studies of sedentary folks in nursing homes–and sedentary folks everywhere–think better when they move more.

I believe it’s also because taking a break from being in our analytical left brain opens us to creativity and intuition–the right brain. Often when we let ourselves “take a break” from work, we also take a break from pushing ourselves or criticizing ourselves for not doing enough, not getting it right.

I once got an assignment from a coach to do nothing–NOTHING–five minutes a day. Not meditate, not journal, just BE. For 6 months, 5 minutes a day. I could do that easily now, more used to the slower pace of New Mexico, but back then, wired into the go-go-go of my life in NYC, it was unthinkable. Could YOU do it?

Daydreaming, go out to see the sky, lingering in bed with a good book for a few more minutes..why would we even see this as “wasting time?”. If you treat yourself like a productivity machine, then you would not allow downtime, but how sustainable is that?

If you need further permission, I’ll remind you that fun and pleasure create endorphins, our bodies own ‘feel-good’ chemicals, and endorphins help reduce pain and see challenges as adventures and opportunities for growth. So it will make you feel better and handle any stress better.

Go ahead, waste some time, I dare you!

Categories : Solopreneurs
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If you are an introvert, like me, you’re in very good company! Even though it feels like a very extroverted world out there, and most business advice is written by extroverts for extroverts, the truth is introverts make up about 1/2 the population. That’s why it’s great to find courses, coaching and support from other introverts. It’s one of the things I address in the Shine Out and Prosper program too.

By the way, introverts aren’t always shy or even quiet–but by definition they need a lot of time alone to recharge and nurture themselves.   And some introverts are also HSPs, Highly Sensitive Person, which is something different…many of my clients are HSPs, and I am too, so that will be a topic for another blog post.   If you were ever told you were “too sensitive” you do need to know about the HSP trait and I recommend “The Highly Sensitive Person”” by Dr. Elaine Aron.     Back to introversion…

Here is a great article by Tanja Gardner of Crytal Clarity Copywriting on the Top 3 Energy Sinks for Introverted Biz Owners (and how to deal with them).

“Have you noticed that introversion has suddenly become a REALLY big deal? If you’ve spent time online lately, you’ll know that introversion is a major hot topic. Online publications from Huffington Post to to Salon to the freaking Times of India are acknowledging what we introverts already know. That there are rather a lot of us out there. And that once we figure out how to use our unique strengths, we can become seriously successful…

You might wonder why being introverted is such big news.

After all, extroversion or introversion is really just about how your energy levels respond when you interact with other people. Extroverts get a buzz from interactions, and start to wilt when they spend too long alone. Introverts (like me), are just the opposite – we thrive on alone-time and reflection, while back-to-back interactions flatten us.

Discovering that you’re not the only one can be life-changing for introverts!

Learning about what introversion is really about was a game-changer for me. Suddenly, a whole load of things that had confused me about how my brain works made sense. And finding out that I wasn’t the only introvert out there (depending who you ask, somewhere between 25-57% of the population is introverted) was crazy-reassuring.

But even after I realised this, there were still three major energy sinks that could knock me off balance as an introverted business owner. And if I didn’t do something to manage each energy sink, it would keep me that way. Here’s what they are, and how I deal with them.

Energy sink #1: Overscheduling

Yes, sure: extroverts can overschedule themselves too. But this energy sink is particularly relevant for introverts because we rely on getting downtime to ourselves in between appointments to recharge.

That means that “spending” energy on consecutive commitments without time alone in between to “power up” again is a recipe for exhaustion. To avoid this:
•Give yourself permission not to have to do it all: figure out what’s important to you, focus on that, and try to let go of the rest
•Schedule in your weekends and down-time FIRST, then schedule energy-demanding commitments around those blocks
•Where humanly possible, don’t book back-to-back appointments into your calendar

Energy sink #2: not blocking in enough of the right kind of alone-time

As introverts, our defining characteristic is that time alone replenishes our energy.

But not all alone-time activities recharge all introverts equally. Some folks might need to be out in nature to replenish their energy. Others might need to have four walls around them. Some might need the endorphins that come from exercise. And still others want to curl up with a book, or journal, or meditate.

To ensure you get enough of the kind of time you need:
•Identify what you need from your downtime for it to truly energise you – remember it can be different for everyone
•Set specific boundaries to ensure you get what you need during your time off
•Manage the day-to-day things that inevitably crop up to threaten those boundaries (often just five minutes after you set them!)

Energy sink #3: comparing yourself to extroverts

Like I said earlier, we live in an extroverted world. So it’s easy to believe that if you don’t respond like extroverts do – if you’re exhausted by things they enjoy – there’s something fundamentally wrong with you.

But comparing yourself to extroverts often just makes the energy drain worse. Don’t get me wrong: if you’re introverted, interacting does actually cost you energy. But when you make that energy drain mean there’s something wrong with you, you create a vicious cycle that just exhausts you even more. To avoid this:

•Read more about introversion: the more you learn about it, the more you recognize its strengths and gifts, and the less you see it as some kind of flaw. I recommend Self-Promotion for Introverts by Nancy Ancowitz, Introvert Power by Laurie Helgoe, and The Introvert Advantage by Marti Olsen Laney.
•Connect with other introverts: building relationships with other introverts means you get the benefit of their ideas, experiences and resources. It also means they’re more likely to interact in introvert-friendly ways that are less exhausting!
•Keep an eye out for introvert-specific business training: so many of today’s training programmes are written by extroverts for extroverts. Methods that are perfect for those extroverts can just exhaust introverts (and bring out our comparison demons). So, look for training written specifically for introverts instead.”

(end of article)

Introverts…relax…rejoice..and learn how to use this trait as a strength.   And as Tanja suggests, seek out training specifically for introverts.

In support of  your  success and joyful abundance,


For more info about the Shine Out and Prosper Program:

For Tanja’s website:


Categories : Solopreneurs
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